~~~~~by Akshvi<<3
every day until you get
into your head that you are not a
constant self-improvement project
I think nowadays it’s really easy to
fall into the Trap that we need to
constantly be growing constantly be
learning something new self-improving
and the root of that is that we think
there’s something inherently wrong with
us that we aren’t good enough that we
don’t accept ourselves and it’s not a
bad thing we should be growing and we
should be evolving and we should be
trying to be the best version of
ourselves but you need to look in and
think why do I want to change so much do
I want to change because I don’t accept
myself because I hate myself or in a
more healthy view do I want to change
because I know that it’s good for me and
I truly want to try to be the best
version of myself
when you get addicted
to changing yourself all the time when
you don’t get that change it can be very
very disheartening and very sad and I
know her because I already for the past
few years I’ve had so much change I feel
like a totally new individual each year
and I got addicted at looking back at
who I was in the previous year or the
previous months I enjoyed looking back
and criticizing who I once was and
looking at who I am now but you know
what’s funny
I was never happy
I could never accept myself still
I would always look back on the previous
version of me
and scold her almost you’re too cringy
you didn’t work hard enough blah blah
blah blah yeah that version of me
got me to where I am today you need to
learn to accept yourself in every stage
of your life you gotta thank that girl
or boy for getting you to where you are
today because you don’t need to be fixed
and sometimes these feelings they stem
from our childhood if you grew up with a
nation family
I’m gonna BET right now that they
compared you to other children that
child plays piano better than you got
better grades than you are you like this
why can’t you be like that kid it stems
so early that there is something
fundamentally wrong with us and that we
have to change and it doesn’t help that
Tick Tock YouTube whatever there’s so
many new trends like that girl trans
self-improvement Trends productivity
Trends you don’t need to change all the
time change more honestly naturally
happen to some extent if you’re focusing
on actually becoming a better person but
you don’t need to take Extreme Measures
all the time for example last year I had
a breakup
it was very painful and it absolutely
catapulted me into this new version of
myself and I became so addicted to the
level of growth I had and the feeling it
gave me because I totally transformed
not only did my income rise so much I
felt like I evolved as a person and that
amount of growth cannot be expected
every single year because obviously that
drastic event shaped me for 2021 and I
went into 2022 excited how am I going to
change into a new person this year and
when I didn’t get the same level of
change I got in 2021
I felt really bad about myself and then
it made me start to realize my happiest
years were probably when I just came out
of high school 2018 to 2020 I was
ignorant and I just lived my life and I
did experience growth but I wouldn’t say
I was obsessively focused on it and
that’s why I was happy and I actually
accepted myself
but when you try to
change yourself so much all the time
what you’re actually saying is I don’t
like who I am and I don’t accept myself
I’m going to talk about this further in
another video but there’s so many Trends
online which
aim to inspire you to be a new version
of you but really the either
manipulation tactics or they’re just
trying to change fundamentally who you
are like one of them the whole Femme
Fatale thing first of all they all send
back to gaining mail validation which is
not the goal here secondly they’re
trying to teach you to not be yourself
in dating situations and try to play a
character to get the man well what
happens when you get that person are you
going to keep up this act
don’t you want someone to actually
accept you for who you are to love you
for who you are these Trends teach you
to not like yourself
I also want to add
that sometimes you can feel like you’re
not growing but you actually are
hindsight is a wonderful thing and I
really encourage you to keep a journal
of your thoughts sometimes I read my old
journals and I’m like wow I didn’t even
know that I used to think like this I
can’t remember it was so long ago and
that’s when you can really observe your
growth but sometimes growth it does not
come in the obvious forms of starting a
new business huge career growth success
whatever it can come in many other ways
like you change your pattern of thinking
which I think is arguably the most
important one imagine if you went from a
limiting mindset to an abundance mindset
in one year how would that change your
life it would change your life more than
just increasing your salary additionally
growth takes time especially big growth
when I was 18 I had no concept of what
it meant to improve myself or change I
remember thinking there was just
something wrong with me and it made me
really depressed and I couldn’t pinpoint
what it was I remember I would make mind
maps to try to sort out what was in my
brain and I couldn’t and when I thought
I had the answer
I would make a plan and it would be a
one week plan and in that one week the
goal was by the end to be a radically
transformed new version of myself and
then when the end of the seven days
would come and I would be exactly the
same
I would beat myself up because I had no
concept of change
is change going to occur in one week no
it occurs over years and years and years
for the rest of your life you need to
think of the full spectrum of your life
not just one year to you a few months
you need to think of all the decades
you’ve got to live all the things you’re
going to go through you’re going to be a
parent you’re going to be a grandparent
if you’re lucky you’ll be a great
grandparent you’ll go through divorces
maybe start a new job start a business
so many things which are going to change
you like it doesn’t have to happen now
it doesn’t have to happen now because
it’s inevitably going to happen at some
stage in your life also I want to
apologize if I’m not if I’m not speaking
entirely eloquently I just had locked
jaw and my jaw is still kind of locked
here so I’m struggling to speak my voice
is quivering because I haven’t spoken
all week so I’m not like on my flow you
know I’m not on my [ __ ] flow like
usual I also want to say that I consider
myself like a newborn baby like a
toddler
because I don’t consider myself to have
really started my life until I was 18.
perhaps it was different for you but I
know until I was 18. I was just in
school I entered the real world at 18
when I moved away from home across the
country
that’s when I started to really really
grow I’m 22 years old now so I’ve been
out here for like what four or five
years I’m four or five years old you
guys
I’m a toddler I’m a toddler and you
might be a toddler too I’ve only been
out here four or five years you know
what that means
can you expect a toddler to rapidly
learn so much in these five years to
radically become the person of their
dreams no
maybe that’s like a really stupid
analogy but I like to think of that that
way when I’m being hard on myself when
I’m like damn I’m only 22 and I’m not
like a [ __ ] billionaire I’m only five
I got a long life ahead of me and when
you start to see yourself from the
perspective of a toddler it makes me
realize
how young you are Festival but also how
much more you have to learn
and how much time you have
because people make it seem like your
20s other make or break years
oh my God 20s are the best ages of your
life by the time you’re 30 and you’re a
woman you’re done I feel that pressure
girl
but we gotta break out of that take your
time enjoy your life learn things here
and there but don’t do it for the sake
of wanting to be an entirely new version
of you
now if you’re actually a terrible human
being which I don’t think you are
because then you wouldn’t be watching
this type of video but let’s just say
you’re a terrible human being you have
really bad habits like you were
spiraling your life is not going
anywhere then maybe you need to change
yourself completely but I don’t think
you’re in that situation
so chances are you’re a really good
person okay you have great qualities you
might need a little bit of tweaking here
and there to get you to the person you
want to be
but know that it doesn’t have to happen
right now you don’t have to beat
yourself up if you’re not experiencing
the level of growth you want to do every
day just make little steps towards that
person
who was your dream person
she fit okay don’t wake up and cry
because you’re not like a Victoria’s
Secret model tomorrow but every day work
out a little bit maybe go for a walk you
want to be more intelligent you want to
learn a language what do you do you read
more you study you take these little
steps it’s not going to be overnight the
problem with social media is that we see
things happen so quickly we forget that
it takes years and years and years
sometimes decades for someone to level
up in the career field and to build
their dream life it’s not like an
overnight thing but the internet makes
it seem like that whatever you want you
will get it it will come in due time if
you make the small steps don’t beat
yourself up have self-love have
compassion make the little steps every
day and you’ll get there and also next
time you watch a video on the internet
where someone is detailing their extreme
growth they had or the extreme things
that you’ve achieved
take a step back
and ask yourself is this normal is this
happening to every single person
no we might see like a couple of videos
in our for you page of
people who have achieved the same things
and that distorts your perception even
more because now you’re like oh everyone
is achieving these things
Love ……love…..
High Vibes Haven 